Live Tour de France

You can follow a live text description of the Tour de France here with the BBC.

But, excuse me, how interesting is that going to be?


1614 The cyclists are cycling through France. Everybody looks really French.

1619 All of the cyclists are on cycles. Each cycle has two wheels.

1623 The cyclists are cycling on a French road. The road is long and black.

1630 On both sides of the road, we can see the French countryside. It's green. Sometimes there are trees. Sometimes not.

1635 The cyclists are still cycling. This is an up hill stage, so they're going.. up.

1641 Some of the French supporters are carrying baguettes. None of the cyclists are.

1654 Many, if not all, of the cyclists are on some form of steroid.

1659 OH MY GOD! An alien space craft has abducted fifteen of the cyclists. The remaining cyclists were destroyed instantly by some kind of space-death-ray. There are flames and explosions everywhere! French people are running screaming, clutching their baguettes to protect them! Oh the humanity!

1701 Actually, I was just joking. The cyclists are still cycling. God I'm bored.