Mafia Cry Baby

Mafia boss cries his way out of prison. I'm sorry, cries his way out of prison?! What happened to the horses' heads?! The offers they can't refuse?! The Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes?!

...How different 'The Godfather' might have been:


Louis' Italian-American Restaurant. Evening. Micheal Corleone, Sollozzo and Police Captain McCluskey are sat round a table.

MICHEAL: 'Look (sniff), what I want (swallows), what's most important to me (eyes start to tear up). Is that I have a guarantee (voice shakes with emotion) - No more attempts on my father's life! (breaks down in tears)'

(MICHEAL is face down on the table sobbing)

SOLLOZZO: '(Deep breath) What guarantees can I give you Mike? (Brings his hand to his mouth for a moment to hide his emotion) I'm the hunted one! (turns away, his eyes welling up with tears) I missed my chance! (bursts into tears. Begins to sob uncontrollably)

MCCLUSKEY: (Pats SOLLOZZO on the shoulder) 'There there Sollozzo, you crazy knife wielding Mafioso bad guy, there's always going to be another chance.'

SOLLOZZO: (Looks up at MCCLUSKEY with hope in his tear filled eyes) 'Really?'

MICHEAL: (Slams the table with his fists like a child) 'No more attempts on my Daddy's life!' (Collapses again. Face down on the table. Sobbing.)

MCCLUSKEY: (Puts his other arm around MICHEAL) 'Hey Mikey! It's not so bad! If your father dies, you would become boss of the family!'

MICHEAL: (Head still in his heads) 'But Sonny's older than me! (Cries a lot more) It's not faaaaair!!!'

MCCLUSKY: 'Don't worry about Sonny. They're gonna shoot him on the causeway.'

MICHEAL: (Looks up at MCCLUSKEY with hope in his tear filled eyes) 'Really?'