Spain Vs Italy, E'Spiderman Vs The Italian Spiderman and words of wisdom

In prepartion for Sunday.....

Spain Vs Italy

I give you all 'E'spiderman (the Spanish Spiderman)' Vs 'The Italian Spiderman':

E'spiderman:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDJ1rD2OJQk&feature=related


Italian Spiderman:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhHhXukovMU

Really, I have no idea is this is meant to be serious or not... I mean they were all taking a lot drugs back in then... and there's nothing in this world quite like Italian Expoltation Cinema. It's a magical cinematic experience all of its own.


And finally, some actual English practise, something forwarded to me by my bestest buddie in the whole wide world, Yvonne, if you're interest you can check out her blog here:

http://ithadbetterbegood.blogspot.com/

It's filled with interesting observations and stories about life in Dublin and trying to write your first novel. She also writes some pretty damned nifty travel pieces for those of you who like travelling, links to which can be found here:

http://www.yvonnereilly.com/?page_id=5


And now, the English practise...

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact just f*** off and leave me alone.

2. The darkest hour is just before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbour's milk, that's the time to do it.

3. Sex is like air. It's not important unless you aren't getting any.

4. No one is listening until you fart.

5. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

14. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

15. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

16. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

17. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.