The Mysterious Rover Collapse?

In the UK, The Serious Fraud Office is investigating the collapse of Rover. For those of you who don't know, Rover was the last 'mass-manufactured' car maker in the UK. And this is the second investigation into the collapse.

But what's the big mystery? The cars were rubbish! Hmmm... Why did Rover collapse? Was it connected to the Kennedy assassinations? No! The cars were rubbish! Were the CIA involved? Nope, rubbish cars. Did aliens manipulate the space-time-quantum? Eh, no. Cars. Rubbish.


Having said all that, I am a proud Rover driver. And when asked, why do I drive such a rubbish car? How do I reply? It's not rubbish. It's a classic. They don't make Rovers anymore, that's the definition of a classic.